Getting on with Life at 31

31 is plainly a number but when tagged as age, everyone seems to make a big fuss over it.

Now why am i writing something about age?
I guess this is the time of your life that you start to reflect on the thing that you did prior to this age. Yes! I am 31 and just don't ask me if I'm proud of it because answering you is like solving a complicated calculus problem.

I remember I was 21 and it was the day I decided that I'm gonna get what I want. I came from a family that went through a lot of hurricanes in life. Aside from having parents brought up the traditional way, Christianity played an integral and important part of our day to day lives. Sad to say, I was not buying it at all..I just had other plans....(I swear my parents and my siblings will slap me for this!)

Born with an older brother (33) and a sister (22), I was more of the person who had strong thoughts. I say what I want and I would try reason when I had the chance to. So to make my random thought for the day short, I moved out of my parents home just because I wanted to be free. Not that I was a slave but the more I couldn't live my life the way I wanted it to be, the more I became miserable.

10 years later, I see myself living comfortably on my own making my own decisions, pondering on my mistakes and making my life better. I am better than good.

Some of the things I'm proud to enumerate for the past ten years:

1. made good friends and connections
2. took off all excessive baggage and learned to be mean when needed.
3. been broke but remained to be financially responsible (in my own terms)
4. and was able to buy things that I thought would take me a lifetime to buy....

I would not trade my decision that I made 10 years ago.

At rate that I am going, I have another moment to fill and that is to make the next 10 years more memorable....

So cheers to those who had ventured on life and never had any regrets......

Biting my Teeth Off!

Who would have guessed that tonight is going to turn out disastrous...

i do believe that there are things better left unsaid. In my opinion, its better to say things that others wouldn't want to hear. It hurts, yes it hurts.

I wouldn't dare go into the details as per my opening statement. I just wished that i had so much vocabulary to find the right combination of sentences to say to someone so that it may not come out offensive. What can i do?

I either have limited vocabulary, tactless or simply straightforward.

I was about to rant about a day that didnt quite start out well but i guess its too late for that....still the day ended well with food on the table. Life is hard...life is tough.

Earth Hour....Calling Everyone...

Making this day special for everyone as we heed the call to show support and that we care.

Starting All Over Again

It's been probably 2 years since i stopped writing....Back when blogging was not yet a fad...I was there. Back then, I didn't have a private gadget of my own. I was constantly racing against time to make sure all of my emotions were being posted...Now I have the comforts of my dining table and my 2-year old laptop. I can continue writing.

I am currently wondering what subject should I stick to...I thought, "Why stick with a subject when you want to blurt it all out?"

So the tradition continues.

One day, I'll come to terms with picking a single subject to talk about and its not going to come soon. Hence, we move on to just talking about anything and everything.

It is 5:22 AM and I am about to retire for the day and begin a brand new week, with brand new experiences which I may or may not like at all....

this is life and this is how it's going to be....

Shaped up Through my Amazing Past

Just recently Domz instantly hooked me up on a chat and it was all awe-inspiring to have two of my closest friends way back in university who are not married with 3 kids. Technically, the third kid would take it’s place next year.

We never had an official group name (You have to admit that it was the fad before….) but the group was composed of the following: Rowena and Ryan Bustamante, Paul Salipong, Myself, Leah Antonio and Loida Pereyra.

Left to Right: Loidz, Owen and Ryan, Paul and Me

Both of this people were from the university choral group where we used to belong. Things that I enjoyed doing aside from academics. I could not imagine life during my younger years without these people.

I haven’t heard much from Paul and Leah. They were also part of the bunch who had so much passion for music. Loida is now married with a kid and according to Owen, Paul had a kid from a girl in CDO but then there was too much of a complicated love story going on that the relationship got doomed.

Anyway, no matter how good or bad the latest developments were, it was just enough for me to know that these people I always had the best time with were still alive and kicking.

Here are some things we really enjoyed doing before:

- We hang out at a park after practice sessions because we just wanted to sing. We couldn’t stop.

- We caroled way back 1996 (I am not even sure of the year….) where we earned Php 1,000.00. According to Owen, I was a little upset because the earning barely made it to the 1K mark so I had to tell everyone not to go home until we make it. We ended up going to Dunkin’ Donuts having 1 piece of donut and hot chocolate drink.

- We went to this spring pool somewhere near Owen’s place. We did some trekking until we found a spot where we would eat and sing. It was so much fun.

- We were kids around 16 or 17 and were practically studying away from our parents. So if at some point we ran out of budget, we surely had someone to go to. Ryan was our favorite. He was frugal and really knew how to manage his money. Of course, we took turns at some point but most of the time, Ryan was the first stop….Makes me really laugh remembering it because I am the one who usually had some problem with finances.

- We would find time to schedule house visits and Owen was gracious enough to accept and fit us into their lovely and humble home at a remote place where there were a lot of spring pools. Paul was also eager to have us in his home. The food was amazing. I wouldn’t bother saying YES especially if I am already out of budget since there would be free food.

- I would say that we were the life and soul of the group since we were so close that we almost had the group on our hands. In a good way. Ryan was the president, I took turns as the Vice or Secretary (grrrrrr….), Loida, Leah and Owen were the librarians who would make sure that all musical pieces were account for.

I almost literally cried remembering it while I was chatting with Owen and Ryan together with Domz last night. It had to end because Owen had to rest since she’s pregnant. I also had to keep myself busy. I had to train myself not to sleep in the evening since I work graveyard.

I am taking this opportunity to thank these people who shaped my life by providing me with the best childhood experience. If not for the friendship and the love for music, we would have not molded ourselves into the best career men and women right now.

My gratitude remains to be indescribable. The memories are so vivid that it feels like it never ended. That the fun would never end. It had but it left us connected.

I miss you all and I hope to meet you anytime soon.

Keep in touch guys!

Shining even when my lights are OFF!

Yesterday and Today is a torture. I cannot make sense of all the things that are happening and I am pretty pissed off. I am really resigned to the idea that the day may bring a lot of frustration if I continue to sulk in it. I could only think of one thing. Get it all out through this!

- I had my day planned last night for a drinking session with some recently known friends and yet I didn’t get any confirmation that it may not happen at all despite me making an effort to know what’s going on. WTF!

- My brother promised to do my picture cards. These cards are to be used to officially relaunch my work team for the month of October. All I had were promises. Yet I am still hoping he would have it finished soon. I am frustrated because it is only my brother whom I have a lot of respect when it comes to this stuff.

- Another friend of mine who is coming with me to Palawan at the end of November, could not even call Cebu Pacific to have the name changed/updated on his ticket. Why? Because none of the phone numbers I gave him work. WTF! Am I supposed to hand it over all the time? Come on! I will be so disappointed if matters are not taken care of when it’s time to leave. Definitely something that will really piss me off.

- An eye-candy of mine wants to be wooed. Are you serious? You are not the “and all and be all” of my fantasies. Stop acting as if you’re god’s gift to me. Maybe take a look at the mirror and start feeling what you’re supposed to feel.

- YOU! With the main picture of ADIDAS on your Friendster. STOP PRETENDING as if ill die not seeing you one day. Geez, there’s so much good stuff going around that’s worth dying for. Definitely you don’t make the cut.

To avoid staying pissed off, I decided to sleep my anger away. I just don’t understand why people cannot pay me the same courtesy I afforded them. Isn’t it hard to do? A little effort can really make a difference.

I am whining and I will continue to whine.

Jory, you have been a constant counsellor amidst my insanity and thank you for keeping me grounded. If you read this, you will truly.

Jules, I would have wanted to come to the party last night with your boo. I was just not in the right state of mind. I would ruin your party. Ill make it up to you soon.

I have been pretty lazy and bad with my sleeping habits lately. I have been constantly late for work and I must say this is something that is making me a little pissed off too.

Okay, I really don’t want to ruin everyone’s day just because I am not having fun myself. Yet again, these are just moments I really wanna blurt out.

To the people who continue to inspire me:

My Team Orlando (BEH!)…..stay strong. We will sail through the month. Let’s hold on to what we achieved last month. I am very proud of you. Love you all!

Candy, retention may bring some good vibes for you so make good!

I feel better now!

OCTAVA and My Wonderful Memories

Last Mid August, I came across several group messages from my Yahoo groups and I learned that the resident university choral group I used to be with was coming to Manila for an “engagement” (this was what our conductor used to say that meant ACTIVITY). Oh yeah ladies and gentleman! I LOVE SINGING!

I was a little excited as I was to meet one of the most influencial people who shaped my musical talent. To make it more exciting, I was on leave. Now that made it more special!

Where to?

It was to be at 1 Esplanade just beside the biggest mall (I hope I am right by stating this….) in the Philippines, Mall of Asia. So I decided to prep up, wear something that would at least contrast what I used to be before. Take note, I was this tiny and lanky Tenor 2 who used to take charge of the group while our conductor was away.

Frank, of course, have grown old. Yet the same confidence and cockiness that made him loved by everyone never changed. He was still continuing the legacy he started during the 70’s. His passion never wilted. He may look tired all through these years but music makes him stronger and younger.

This was what I was waiting for…I had to see it for myself how the group progressed all throughout these years since we left the university. There were talks about permanently ending the group’s existence since there were constant concerns on funding. The group was always limited to having university concerts and mini out of town presentation. I was one of those who witnessed the struggle of each team to come up with funds to come up with decent costumes. Money earned during engagements were saved up for equipments needed for future concerts. We were like circus people wandering from one place to another in the hopes of getting more exposure. IT WAS A STRUGGLE. Sad to say it is still the same struggle up to this present time. I have nothing but praises for the perseverance. This is all for the love of music.

Music brought people together to create harmonious tunes. The Dimalen’s were there (Dave, Pie and Riccia) including Robert, Gen and Diomel. It was fun to sing with them. Well, one thing’s for sure, we were missing some lines of the

songs we liked before. Every moment spent together was worth like a diamond handed to a bride. Moments were special. I could go on describing but that wouldn’t even make a perfect picture of what was 8 years ago like with the group.

Much has changed since then. The vocal quality has improved on the soprano section which I am really very impressed. I guess I would be biased to mention that our batch had the best Alto, Bass and Tenor singers. Sopranos were struggling but were good too. Talents were hard to find. We might get a lot of people who auditioned during our time but we end up with less people making the cut.

The love for music continues……even on my third decade of existence and it shall stay strong. I couldn’t thank Frank enough for the legacy he left while we were with the choir.